Earlier this month a friend contacted me to say he had just been diagnosed with hiv. He felt high anxiety to say the least, at the thought of what would happen to him and unable to think clearly of what next steps to take. We discussed the questions and options that were coming up and I thought "hey, I have been hiv for 11 years and now I can use my experience to relieve somebody else’s anguish! I might as well share the little I know with as many people who benefit from hearing/reading it!" So, here it is. My own, 100% biased take on how to cope with a recent hiv diagnosis.

  1. You’re better off knowing. Sure, ignorance is bliss (even today that crosses my mind) but knowledge really is power. The fact that you know you are hiv is not a death sentence. If you were feeling unwell for a while, now you know what was going on and now you can act to stay fit and healthy.
  2. You will be fine for many years. I made a mistake when I was diagnosed; I asked my doctor how long I had left to live. He hesitated and said ten years. It’s been eleven years now and not only am I still alive, I have not even been sick at all. I used to get endless throat complaints and now they are gone. Look after yourself the way you are meant to.
  3. Your life will not change dramatically. Mine has not unless I allowed myself to think that hiv was a big deal. When I got that new job, I was afraid that disclosing my ’status’ to the occupational physician would get me into trouble. Instead, I was able to tell him that I was no differently able than before and that as a computer engineer I didn’t put anyone at risk.
  4. Should you tell your friends? Your family? There is no rule but this one: if it is going to help you to tell them, then do. I know my sister would collapse if she knew so I will not tell her unless I need her to know. I would not like to feel that it was in the back of her mind when we are together, so it suits me better this way. After all I don’t tell her every time I have a cold sore/ headache/ bloated stomach – so why would she need to know about what goes on in my blood?
  5. Should you tell anyone at all? Yes, sexual partners should know but let’s face it, it is a bit of a conversation stopper. Choose carefully when you decide to tell them. Protect them. They will be worried about what that means for them; so make sure you understand what hiv means for you in the first place. Also if you are in a contract with someone else (business associate, mortgage or insurance) you may have a legal or contractual obligation to tell them. Give yourself time to consider in which case it is necessary to appropriate.
  6. Your friends will be supportive. The ones I chose to tell were wonderful and told me things I could never imagine they would. It made me realised how blessed I was to have them and how important I was in their lives. Very few drifted apart over the years, in fact just one did.

Surely if someone says you are stupid, you want to prove them wrong. I can’t think of any better reason now to continue with what I set out to achieve.

“HIV sceptics beyond stupid” Robert Gallo
The Supreme Court of South Australia is examining the case of a man accused of infecting partners with HIV. The man’s line of defense consists in saying that “HIV does not exist.”

It is an interesting line of defence to say the least and I am curious to hear what comes out of court. Although I share the views that maybe HIV is not exactly what Gallo ‘et al.’ think it is which makes me somewhat of a HIV sceptics… I’m also a HIV-sceptic sceptic! After all, I still need a satisfying explanation for the deaths of thousands of people over the past 25+ years… Surely, they weren’t all just lifestyle-related deaths, were they?

Anyway, Gallo gave his testimony. Is Gallo the best person to talk about HIV objectively. Sure, he has the experience… But he and his team defined HIV in their own terms which I understand they had to bend the traditional definition of viruses (Koch’s postulates) to make it fit ‘their’ virus.

In other words, Gallo ‘et al.’ have too much to lose to be able to look at HIV in any new way. Besides, if HIV was not what they said it is, then they would have to live with the deaths of thousands, the waste of billions of dollars in research, the mobilisation of people around the world over what may have been the wrong virus.

Daily Times – Leading News Resource of Pakistan – Tommy Morrison comes back after battling drugs, drink and HIV

Medicine Man is quick to tell us that “Morrison, like Magic Johnson, has been taking HIV drugs and they have worked so well that the disease is more or less in remission.” Which is unverifiable of course, and not what Morrison himself believes.
I want to retest too.

BBC – Video Nation – HIV by Allan Jordan

In which, said Allan explains how hiv has changed his life and he doesn’t even have moons on his fingers. Someone explain to me since when the moons on your fingers are 1) a sign of health and 2) a symptom of hiv or absence of. I shall start measuring mine. Maybe it was better when I didn’t know.

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Papadopulos-Eleopulos “No link between HIV and AIDS, court told – Breaking News – National – Breaking News”

A follow up to my previous post. This time the defence’s point of view, Ms Papadopulos-Eleopulos argued that HIV had never been isolated.

Me, I don’t know. I hope they are right. After all, we have the Berlin patient and Andrew Stimpson to cast doubts on what we are told about some aspects of HIV -and I need to blog about them some time.

So, I don’t know but I am thinking, perhaps if we cast some doubt over the traditional approach to what is killing people so spectacularly, perhaps we will find a new insight. Perhaps all we need is lateral thinking.

Think outside the box, as they say. What have we got to lose? Perhaps invest 5% of the overall HIV budget (or revenue…) into different approaches – see what happens?

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Interesting way of putting things. South Africa’s Treatment Information Group seeks to prosecute the leader of South African Treatment Action Campaign for genocide. The drugs don’t work?

Gay.com UK | Boards

In 1980, Robert Gallo’s first alleged ‘human retrovirus’, ‘HL23V’, was declassified as non-existent. Now ‘HIV ‘ must also be declassified and declared non-existent. No one is ‘HIV positive’.

It is time we set up an AIDS War Crimes Tribunal at The Hague (…).

Hero positif

Saturday 30 December 06

While I do not support Eric Remes’s views on barebacking, I agree with this article published in French on his website.

Reason #356: You are still alive

Wednesday 18 October 06

“You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live – now.”

Joan Baez
Singer/Songwriter

Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.

Your opinion! (Poll)

Tuesday 10 October 06

Getting AIDS is not very green at all.

A new reason to eradicate HIV, it’s bad for green house gasses, and global warming!

The full story is in this blog by Acid Reflux.